Hey friends, did you miss me? Cuz I AM BACKKKK! Thank you for your patience as I have been nose deep in starting all things in PODCAST land regarding the Heart of Dating . Funny enough, starting this Podcast has encouraged me in so many ways to write this post today because it has showed me so much about how going after your dreams and just “getting errrr done” can in ways be better than any perfected, “take me 5 years to launch” kind of dream.
The reality is that this project was an idea back in late December that came to life just 2.5 months later. It has been a crazy, unexpected, beautiful ride that I would never change for anything. There were moments along this journey that I never thought it would be possible… but through this experience I not only learned, but I also carried out the motto that done truly is better than perfect.
This phrase has proven to be true even in the moments I questioned. It has been my GO TO mantra as I have consistently challenged my mindset to step out to do MORE. To do NEW things that I never previously saw myself capable of doing (that is not an exaggeration in the slightest!).
The reality is:
I used to be a perfectionist.
I used to not be able to do anything without it being absolutely PRISTINE.
I used to overthink far too much.
I used to think I was too insignificant to go after my big daunting dreams.
BUT here is the thing…. God has shown me throughout the years that His will is always greater than mine.
To be reaaaaal honest, if all the things that happened in my life were due to how “perfect” things were that I completed, then I am not sure I’d really be anywhere today. Wait. Stop. Repeat that.
If all the things that happened in my life were due to how “perfect” things were that I, myself, completed, then I am not sure I’d really be anywhere today.
Do you ever think about that?
Do you ever reflect on the crazy amazing things God has done FOR your life to make it what it is today. Do you ever think about the times you have stepped out without ANY clue of what you were really doing, but full peace of mind knowing it was a part of your calling?
Maybe you asked for a promotion you felt unqualified for and then GOT IT. Maybe you moved you to a whole new city to start over without knowing fully what you were doing there. Maybe you went on a date with someone unexpected and found an amazing life companion after years of loneliness. Maybe you started a nonprofit on top of having a full time job when everyone told you it would be crazy. Maybe you were terrified of public speaking but shared your story in front of a group of 20… or maybe you shared it in front of a group of 100.
When it comes to projects, I understand wanting to put your ALL into something and hold onto it dearly with all your might with every intention of waiting to release it until it is perfect. But here is the thing I want to challenge you to consider. Are you spending SO much time trying to perfect it that you are missing out on the opportunity to grow and learn in the process?Are you spending SO much time trying to perfect it that you are missing out on the opportunity to grow and learn in the process? Click To Tweet
I was. Far too often. And you know what? It was limiting me from being able to truly step out into the unknown. Part of the beauty of living this mysterious life is that we don’t always know where one step will lead us…and we aren’t supposed to. We honestly have to trust God to show us the way.
Sometimes we have our fingers wrapped too tightly around our dreams and projects. Sometimes, we just need to loosen our grip and let the kite be swept up by the wind to see how far it can go… ya know?
I learned the hard way that being a perfectionist, could actually be holding me back. I have had tons of dreams in the past that never made it past Phase 1 because I could not get myself to believe in it just quite enough. I had projects that failed because I overthought it so much that they eventually died. BLOOP. I had ideas that stayed ideas because I became intimated by fear of what others might think of me.
But then over the years I learned a few key things. One significant one that I want to encourage you with today is this…
SUCCESS IS NOT ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK.
It may seem obvious, but how often do we measure our success based on what other people say or think about us? I mean TRULY. If I’m being really honest, I DO THIS ALL THE TIME. Or at least, I do it far too often. But how is wondering what others think actually going to help me achieve my goal?
If I cared so much about what others think I probably would never…
…have gotten vulnerable on this blog.
…done any ounce of public speaking because OOF that is grounds for insecurity.
…posted a photo of myself in a bathing suit.
…start a podcast on DATING.
…applied for jobs that I wasn’t fully qualified for on paper.
Take this and apply it to your own life. Maybe even write down a few things you potentially did not do because of being held back by the opinions of others.
What have you tried to do but stopped midway because what others thought was intimidating?
What have you always dreamed of starting but hesitated because you thought you wouldn’t be accepted?
What have you launched but given up on because of lack of enthusiasm in the beginning?
Maybe it is a sport. A leadership opportunity. A job. A relationship. A far fetched dream…or a huge vision for your life. Now, I am not saying by doing all of the above that I did not struggle with some form of insecurity. Truth be told I totally did. All.the.time. Sometimes painstakingly.
But the truth of the matter is, when you can consciously separate what other people will think about you from HOW good you are actually doing, I promise you will be FAR more successful in your journey.But the truth of the matter is, when you can consciously separate what other people will think about you from HOW good you are actually doing, I promise you will be FAR more successful in your journey. Click To Tweet
My Podcast, Heart of Dating is a full on, clear picture of this mantra living in action. Yall listen to this, I had ZERO idea how to start a podcast 2 months ago. I had no idea what audio equipment I needed. I had no clue what an “intro” and “outro” entailed. I completely forgot that you even needed a logo. I barely even thought about creating a website. Oh, and interviewing people? Psh, well I wasn’t becoming Oprah overnight… though sometimes I wished I could.
There are days I don’t feel qualified. There are interviews that I bumble through. There are moments I have to google and hope for the best. I am investing hours and hours into work that right now I am not getting paid to do.
BUT ALAS, I am doing it because I feel inspired. I feel confident. I don’t care what other people might think because I know my intentions are good and true and servant hearted. I feel a specific call on my life to do this, despite the outcome. Every day I make a conscious effort to separate what people might think of me and how they might see me…. and it isn’t easy… but it is so FREEING!
The topic of dating is one of THE hardest, most ambiguous subjects out there, and I am staring at those cloudy waters and saying great, LET ME DIVE ON IN!
And you know what? Through stepping out and claiming this mantra, it has been the MOST growing, rewarding, satisfying season. Separating my own fears from what I know could be amazing is THE only reason I am able to do this every day.
OH, and one last key nugget for you… It isn’t about how big this is Podcast becomes. It isn’t about how many downloads or subscribers I get along the way. It is about the fact that I did it and I am confident that God is with me along this journey. There are days I don’t know what the next step in front of me looks like, but I know that His hand is guiding me along the path… so I continue to step forth.There are days I don't know what the next step in front of me looks like, but I know that His hand is guiding me along the path... so I continue to step forth. Click To Tweet
So, dearest friends my question for you today is what have YOU been holding off on that you could start today? What has been in your heart for a while that you haven’t had the courage to pursue? What shoes can you dust off and re-step into with a new momentum?
What can YOU do today to stretch to new and amazing, somewhat unthinkable places?